“When I was a little girl, I used to read fairy tales. In fairy tales you meet Prince Charming, and he’s everything you’ve ever wanted. In fairy tales the bad guy is very easy to spot; he’s always wearing a black cape, so you know who he is.” This quote is from a well known singer/songwriter, Taylor Swift. Her song, Love Story, idolizes finding your perfect other half by referencing Romeo and Juliet.
In reality, Romeo and Juliet is nothing more than a three day relationship between a 13-year-old and a 17-year-old that ended in 6 deaths, including those of the “damsel” and the “Prince” when they commit mutual suicide. Who is Prince Charming? Who isn’t he? How do you know if you’ve found him?
Prince Charming is tall, dark, and handsome. He’s charismatic, tantalizing, and dreamy. He is funny, romantic, and caring. He’s respectful, diligent, and loyal.
Your ideal prince would only want a trophy wife like Prince Charming does in the Disney movie Cinderella, be verbally abusive and violent like Prince Adam from Beauty and the Beast, be a compulsive liar like Aladdin, enjoy somnophilia like Prince Ferdinand from Snow White, wait for perfection like Prince Eric from The Little Mermaid, get pissed if you’re not a guy like Li Shang from Mulan, he and his buddies won’t leave your house like John Smith from Pocahontas, convince you to kiss a frog like Prince Naveen from The Princess and the Frog, climb up the side of a tower while pulling your hair like Flynn Ryder/Eugene Fitzpatrick from Tangled, and/or dance with strangers in the forest like Prince Phillip from Sleeping Beauty.
Prince Charming is not ugly, deceitful, or ignorant. He’s not captivating, authentic, or brilliant. He is not a thug, a psychopath, or a traitor. He’s not a monster like Medusa, a Cyclops, or a dragon. He isn’t a hero like Hercules, Odysseus, or Jason. He’s not an orphan, from a good home, or a broken one. Your prince is not someone you’ve gone to school with since preschool, a new acquaintance, or a stranger. “He [isn’t] perfect or anything. He [isn’t] your fairytale Prince Charming or whatever. He tries to be like that sometimes, but I like him best when that stuff falls away,” John Green. Prince Charming isn’t perfect; he has flaws just like every other human being. He’s simply a person who’s trying to do the best that he can.
When your “soul mate” comes along, you’ll know it. “I feel like men are more romantic than women. When men get married they marry, like, one girl, ’cause they’re resistant the whole way until they meet one girl and they think, ‘I’d be an idiot if I didn’t marry this girl; she’s so great.’ But it seems like girls get to a place where they just kind of pick the best option… ‘Oh he’s got a good job.’
I mean they spend their whole lives looking for Prince Charming and then they marry the guy who’s got a good job and is going to stick around,” Blue Valentine. Women think they’ve found a Prince so many times in their lives that eventually, they just settle. That’s one main cause for the high divorce rate in this country; people don’t actually marry for love, they marry for income, sexual attraction, and/or pressure from their families. The only way to know if you’ve found your “Prince Charming” is to be in love, if there even is such a thing as Prince Charming.
“If you look up ‘charming’ in the dictionary, you’ll see that it not only has references to strong attraction, but to spells and magic. Then again, what are liars if not great magicians?” Deb Caletti, author of The Secret Life of Prince Charming. Prince Charming is many things, including, well, charming, but he’s not charming either. If he exists, you’ll know when you’ve found him. Taylor Swift used to read fairytales then she discovered, “Once you grow up, you realize that Prince Charming is not as easy to find as you thought. You realize the bad guy is not wearing a black cape, and he’s not easy to spot; he’s really funny, and he makes you laugh, and he has perfect hair.” Don’t fall for the bad guy when your Prince Charming could be right around the corner.
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