Premarital Sex
Premarital sex has been considered a moral issue and sin by a number of religions, but since the 1960s, in Western countries it has become more widely accepted. Where is premarital sex shaming originated? “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning made them male and female’ and for this reason a man should leave his parents and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh?”(Matthew 19:4-5; quoting from Genesis 1:27, 2:24). In this scripture, Jesus does not shame those who have had premarital sex but includes that he made man and woman and after marriage they shall become one flesh. Becoming one flesh expresses recreation, love, and the spiritual and physical union of a relationship. Although Jesus did not exactly say “Premarital sex is a sin” in the biblical view, adultery is any sexual activity outside a committed marriage. Adultery is considered a sin and in many cultures those who have committed this sin could only be forgiven by god if those repent from their sins. In order to be forgiven, one must ask both god and their spouse for forgiveness. God wants all people to save sex for marriage because it is a holy act and its powerful bond affects the relationship between a man and a woman as nothing else can. The theory that sex shall be for married couples only and shall be considered a sin if acted upon prior is understood by the underlying factors of the social, psychological, and health gains from abstaining from sexual intercourse. But today, the cultural values and expectations have gradually changed in America over decades. Having sex before marriage should not be frowned upon in today’s society if it’s been two people who believe they actually love each other. Sexual experimentation is common in the 20th century and guides adolescent’s sexual knowledge in gaining an understanding of one’s sexual desires and other’s desires.
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Today, abstinence only education is not legal in California but has been taught worldwide in the past. Abstinence only education taught that sexual intercourse outside of marriage is prohibited, and that abstinence from sexual activity is the only way to avoid out-of-wedlock sexually transmitted infections, and pregnancies. Sexual intercourse outside of marriage is also said have harmful psychological and physical side effects, and consequences for a child born under these circumstances. But the most important lesson is attaining self-sufficiency before engaging in sexual activity. Similarly, comprehensive sexual education teaches abstinence but also includes important factors if one decides not to abstain from sexual activity until marriage. Comprehensive sexual education includes human development, relationships, personal kills, sexual behavior, sexual health, and society and culture. Although many till believe that abstaining form sex until marriage is common it is also common for people to have sex before marriage. With that being said, abstinence only education has been proven to be ineffective in protecting adolescent health and sexual activity. Comprehensive sexual education teaches the best way to abstain from sexual intercourse, alternatives to sexual intercourse, and safe sexual intercourse tips. Being educated on many possible alternatives from abstaining form sexual intercourse until marriage has been proven effective. Many believe that comprehensive sexual intercourse taught to adolescents will speed up the time frame in which someone wants to engage in sexual activity. But this theory has not been proven accurate because all comprehensive sexual education is age appropriate. Premarital sex is emphasized in both abstinence only education and comprehensive sexual education but is taught in various ways.
In the 14th century, premarital sex was prohibited and considered a sin and having natural sexual desires men would marry younger women in assumption that they were still virgins. Women would marry men who could support their family financially and securely. Most of the men were crusader knights who were away often for long periods of time. In order to keep a man’s wife from becoming sexually active with someone else, a chastity belt was created. Chastity is a term known as refraining from extramarital, or sexual intercourse. A chastity belt is a piece of metal that a woman would wear as an under garment to abstain from all sexual activity including masturbation, unwanted sexual intercourse such as rape, and intended intercourse with someone else also known as adultery. The chastity belt was used for many crusader knights to protect their wives from intercourse while they were away. Although the matter was serious to the crusader knights, many people did not take the chastity belts as serious but definitely humorous. The chastity belt was considered humorous because it symbolized a husband’s insecurity, or fear of another man’s sexual intentions with their wives. It also demonstrated a lack of control over their wife’s sexual desires while they were away. Although premarital sex was a sin and so was adultery in the 14th century women married young to engage in sexual intercourse for procreation, and men created chastity belts to stop their wives from engaging in sexual activities with themselves or others while they were away. As many may argue that the chastity belt may have been one of the most unethical ways of restraining a woman’s sexual desires there have been new findings of a similar device to the chastity belt. “Ultimately, the chastity belt’s existence is perhaps a historical artifact and should be joined to the category of myth. However, a recent innovation, designed to protect women from sexual assault has been criticized as a modern day chastity belt. AR Wear, “a clothing line offering wearable protection for when things go wrong.” It is a developed underwear and under garments that would be extremely difficult for an attacker to remove” says Kate Goldbaum. The updated belt never prospered as a necessity to men or women.
In Islam religion plays a significant role in how their children are raised, and in the Islamic faith a child’s status can be affected whether he or she was born in or out of wedlock. For example, the child will have the last name of its mother, the child cannot receive any inheritance or legal status from the father, and the father will not have any legal obligation towards the child. Although the child conceived in a premarital sexual act and it innocent, the Islamic country states that premarital sex is immoral and sinful. Dating in the Islamic culture to some people is okay but to older folks it n still be sinful because dating involves sexual contact in most cases. Ismail Menk, an Islamic scholar, argues in one of his lectures that love, within boundaries and with expectations of marriage, is an accepted fact of life and religion — if done the right way. This ‘right way’ is accomplished by involving the families from an early stage. Older Muslims continue to reject dating because they assume the Western region can elicit western expectations on to their beloved family members. As some may say premarital sex can be done the right way in America, but in some countries there is not a right way of premarital sex and those caught will continue to have serious consequences. As some people view adultery as sinful, Islam allows monogamy for men. Monogamy is when man or a woman has one or more husbands or wives. In America, a person can only be married to one person at a time, legally. But one commonality that Judaism and Christianity shares is how they view premarital sex. Sex is a normal human biological function in which humans want and need. Waiting until marriage determines who the users are from the committers. Someone who has sex with another before marriage who knows that it’s against his, her, or their religion is a user and will eventually leave. Committers will respect Alah and the religion by waiting until marriage to have sexual contact or relations. Religion is about power and if someone were to disbelieve in all that has been taught then that person has declared the worst sin of all, to declare themselves free form their religion. Making the decision on what choice is right is ultimately up to the person and the ranking of their priorities. Possible factors of having premarital sex depending on the geographic location, some people can be put to death, shamed upon, disowned by family members, or become free from their religion. Some families that are not as strict in religion or parenting could be accepting but it is very unlikely for most unfortunately.
Premarital sex has been considered a moral issue and sin by a number of religions, but since the 1960s, in Western countries it has become more widely accepted. The theory that sex shall be for married couples only and shall be considered a sin if acted upon prior is understood by the underlying factors of the social, psychological, and health gains from abstaining from sexual intercourse. Many countries view premarital sex as being a sin, but many counties also believe that over the past few decades, premarital sex, has become common grounds for starting a relationship that leads into marriage. Premarital sex being done ‘the right way’ has also spurred many biases in what the right way actually is to someone people versus abstaining completely from sexual activity also considered ‘the right way’. A woman’s sexuality has been explored upon for decades and throughout the years, men have come up with many ways or alternatives to keep a woman pure. Today, the underlying factor of the rights and wrongs of premarital sex lie in the hands of a person’s status with society. Someone deciding on having premarital sex has to options, do it or don’t.
Bibliography
Lance, Larry M. (2007). College Student Sexual Morality Revisited: A Consideration of Pre-Marital Sex, Extra-Marital Sex and Childlessness between 1940 and 2000-2005. College Student Journal, 41(3), 727-733.
Majumdar, C. (2018). Attitudes Towards Premarital Sex in India: Traditionalism and Cultural Change. Sexuality & Culture, 22(2), 614-631.
O’Connell, M., & Rogers, C. C. (n.d.). Out-of-wedlock births, premarital pregnancies and their effect on family formation and dissolution. Retrieved from https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/6489509
Office of Adolescent Health. (2016, June 02). Trends in Teen Pregnancy and Childbearing. Retrieved from https://www.hhs.gov/ash/oah/adolescent-development/reproductive-health-and-teen-pregnancy/teen-pregnancy-and-childbearing/trends/index.html
Premarital Sex Is Nearly Universal Among Americans, And Has Been For Decades. (2013, June 17). Retrieved from https://www.guttmacher.org/news-release/2006/premarital-sex-nearly-universal-among-americans-and-has-been-decades
Rastogi, & Moreno. (2010). Abstinence-only education modestly delays initiation of sexual activity. The Journal of Pediatrics,157(1), 172-173.
Statistic Brain. (2017, April 02). Premarital Pregnancy Statistics. Retrieved from https://www.statisticbrain.com/premarital-pregnancy-statistics/
The Bible on Pre-Marital Sex and Sexual Morality. (2016, December 27). Retrieved from https://www.focusonthefamily.com/family-q-and-a/sexuality/the-bible-on-pre-marital-sex-and-sexual-morality
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