Is Divorce too Easy?

Introduction

In recent decades, divorce has increased all over the world, even though marriage is described as a lifelong love. Divorce is defined as the legal dissolution of a marriage by a court or other competent body. Increasing divorce rate is considered as a social problem that has various consequences. More than half of marriages end in divorce very early on in the marriage. Fixing a marriage sounds much more socially appropriate than throwing it away, but reality is: divorce is easier. Divorce is too easy in today’s emerging society due to the frequency and increasing rates, the lack of legal hurdles, and the difficulty spousal decision making.

Frequency & Increasing Rate

Divorce is much more prevalent in today’s society than the past. It is much more common to see divorce take place today. In one poll, out of 2000 participants, 57 per cent agreed or strongly agreed with the statement that “it is too easy to divorce these days” (Bingham). This was polled in 2012, and explains how common the idea is now. The concept of divorce is no longer associated with negative views to most, although there are still a number of people who argue the new ways. Nowadays, due to the changes in technology and the effects on the lives and cultures of the people, especially the youth, divorce is more readily accepted and there is no longer a negative attitude toward it (Morowatisharifabad). With new advancements, it is not seen as such a negative. Today’s youth bring the different views that were unthinkable in the past. In Canada, divorce was not legal in the early 1900s. In 1968 the Divorce Act came about. The number of divorces granted between 1968-1970 jumped by almost 200% (Redmond). The divorce act changed the rates in Canada drastically. Divorce is no longer considered a bad thing, but instead, how very effective it can be. Divorce is used substantially in Canada, and across the globe due to the new laws and views on the topic.

Lack of Legal Hurdles

In many countries, Canada being one, divorce is seen as a simple and easy process to many singles and couples. Under current laws, one person can decide to get divorced for no reason at all, two weeks into their marriage or simply initiate proceedings by moving out. “Mrozek’s report suggests that no-fault divorces have contributed to higher rates of divorce” (Raj). The process begins once one spouse shows proof of why the divorce should occur. This is such a small piece of information to provide, and the fact that only one spouse can initiate the divorce is alarming. There are marriage prep courses available too but many newly engaged couples do not attend them due to the stigma that they are irrelevant. Studies show that the information taught in most prep courses are hard to play out in real life situations. In one study, 2.9% of partners agreed that they had difficulty implementing program skills in their marriage (Scott). In general, it shows that it would be hard to actually use the skills in a heat in the moment conversation. As couples discuss divorce, usually one topic brought up is marriage counselling. Marriage counselling is proven to be very effective, but many couples in modern day society opt out due to the hefty prices. Some therapists are charging between $150 – $250 per hour, which they also recommend 12 weeks of therapy with one session a week (Feureman). Most insurance companies do not cover marriage counselling, so this is seen as not an option to some couples due to the high price points. It also seems difficult to think if all this money spent would actually be successful in saving the relationship. Even with these deterrents like marriage prep courses and marriage counselling, divorce just seems like the easier route to most.

Difficulty in Decision Making

It takes effort to make a marriage work, but it seems the belief about effort is focused either toward the one partner. A person rarely understands how hard they must work on self improvement to make marriage stick. Often what people really want is someone to endorse their perspective, to back up their perceptions, basically, to side with them (Berry). Both parties need to be on the same page in order for the improvement to happen, which is difficult. Many will not change their views due to stubborness. The individual’s attitude toward divorce is one of the most influential factors in their decision making. If one spouse wants the divorce, legally its allowed. It is far easier to find a new partner, one who seemingly accepts you as you are, and whom you find novel interest in, than to recreate interest in another you know so well (Berry). If one spouse wants something out of the other and it just cannot happen, divorce is the easiest option. Due to the stress of thoughts about divorce, couples usually know right away if they would like to fall through with the plan. As mentioned above, divorce seems like the top option to fix the marriage due to its simplicity. A great amount choose it over staying together and fixing the problems (Berry). In today’s disposable culture, when something breaks we get a new one. Everyone agrees with this new culture, with divorce being an excellent example. Both men and women are quick to leave before attempting to resolve the problems they both created. It is so difficult to fix a marriage, that everyone resorts for the easier way out.

Conclusion

There have been many studies which has proven that divorce is too easy. Many people want to stick with the nostalgic past, but reality has taken place. The new perspectives of modern society differs from what has always been done in the past. Divorce is much more common today because of these modern perspectives. The corresponding high rates of divorce is shown between our relationship values, our evolved psychological natures, and our modern social and technological environment (Earp). Divorce is too easy fitting to its frequency and increasing rates, the lack of legal hurdles, and the difficulty spousal decision making. If there was more emphasis on the legal hurdles, marriage prep course, and marriage counselling, divorce rates could decline.

References

Earp, B. D., Sandberg, A., & Savulescu, J. (2012). Natural Selection, Child Rearing, and the Ethics of Marriage (and Divorce): Building a Case for the Neuroenhancement of Human Relationships. Philosophy & technology, 25(4), 561-587.

Bingham, J. (2019). Even divorcees think divorce is too easy, poll finds. Retrieved from https://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/sex/divorce/9748489/Even-divorcees-think-divorce-is-too-easy-poll-finds.html

Definition of DIVORCE. (2019). Retrieved from https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/divorce

Divorce In Canada: Group Suggests It May Be Too Easy To Split Up. (2019). Retrieved from https://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2012/02/22/divorce-canada-laws_n_1294643.html

Divorce Is Easier. (2019). Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-second-noble-truth/201207/divorce-is-easier

Morowatisharifabad, M. A., Mazloomi-Mahmoodabad, S. S., Afshani, S. A., Ardian, N., Vaezi, A., & Refahi, S. (2018). The Concept of Withdrawal of Divorce Petition Based on the Theory of Planned Behavior: A Qualitative Study. Open access Macedonian journal of medical sciences, 6(5), 917-924.

Redmond, J. (2019). Divorce Rate in Canada | LoveToKnow. Retrieved from https://divorce.lovetoknow.com/Divorce_Rate_in_Canada

Scott, S. B., Rhoades, G. K., Stanley, S. M., Allen, E. S., & Markman, H. J. (2013). Reasons for Divorce and Recollections of Premarital Intervention: Implications for Improving Relationship Education. Couple & family psychology, 2(2), 131-145.