In the Indian society, marriages are not a new phenomenon at all since time immemorial; it has actually been practiced for lots of centuries. However, it is prudent for all and sundry to note that instances regarding love marriages in the Indian Society are significantly still very low. This is attributed to the fact that during the last decades, the Indian Society has indeed undergone significant tremendous changes which have made the social fabric of the Indian society to become more flexible thus making girls to become equally treated to boys (Sahay et al, 2017). Due to that, interaction between the opposite sexes has therefore considerably increased and this has been attributed to an increase in the percentage of the love marriages that have occurred in the Indian Country. However, it is important for all and sundry to note that the phenomena have still remained restricted especially to both urban as well as semi-urban places in India.
Even though love marriages in the Indian society do not actually enjoy similar positions and respect in the Indian society as the love marriages, most parents in the Indian society have become more thoughtful regarding the feelings of their children. The major reason for opposing the love marriages in the Indian society is due to religion or caste differences. This is because most individuals in the Indian society are quite skeptical in marrying off their children in cultural settings that are deemed as being “alien”. In addition to that, there are also other crucial issues such as the horoscope compatibility as well as the economic standards which greatly hinder the love marriage processes in the Indian society (Yingling et al, 2014).
In the ancient India, most of the women were usually attributed to a status which was much higher as opposed to what they have now in the contemporary society. As a result, such women were not actually confined to any of the home boundaries and they were even allowed much more freedom especially based on the terms of their choices in life. The women had a big say especially when it came to issues of selecting their life partners and thus the concept of love marriages were actually quite common in the society. As a result, concepts such as Swayamvars were indeed based on the women’s consent while the men on their part proved their mettles as being best suitors. At that time, love marriages were indeed too common and thus were welcomed highly by the Indian society. Even the literatures and religious scriptures of the time tell and indicate tales of the Gods as well as Goddesses not only falling in love but also getting married.
It is prudent to note that with the advent and subsequent adoption of tenets such as the Manu Smriti, concepts of both good and bad were ultimately changed or altered in the Indian society. It was therefore advocated that words of the head of the family were supreme thus making it quite evident that it was indeed “good karma” to obey elders in the society. As such, the women in the Indian society were therefore designated as being symbols of great honour in the family thus making them to become placed under men’s protection. This made much of the freedom which such women enjoyed during the Vedic era or period to become curbed (Sareen et al, 2013). This made the caste system to become vigorously enforced and thus making it become imperative that marriage in the society happened or occurred within the set or stipulated restrictions that had been imposed by the society and the religion. Due to that, arranged marriages became the norm where most of the elders in the Indian society actually sought the matchmakers’ services that would subsequently search for suitable matches even if it meant those from places which were far away (Bijleveld et al, 2016). Gradually, the love marriage concept not only lost popularity but also became an “undesired custom” in the societal norms and frameworks of the Indian Society. Customs such as child marriages, honor killings, and dowry came into the existence so that they can enforce the arrange marriages preferences and also discourage any form of love marriages intentions from the minds of people in the Indian society.
In order to ascertain the whether people in the Indian society preferred love or arranged marriages, interview schedules were arranged between among the youth and the elders. According to interviews which were carried out, it was ascertained that most of the people preferred love instead of arranged marriages.
One of the significant concepts associated with love marriages is known to lie in the fact that the girl or boy chooses or selects her or his life partner. This implies that there are no elderly or parental supervision that is involved even though in India, it is a common norm that the approval of the elders is usually sought for before the girl and boy in love can ultimately tie the knot. The restrictions associated with the social status, caste, religion, and even physical appearance are not given consideration when individuals fall in love and thus such clauses are not part and parcel of marriage discussions (Hennink et al, 2014).
One of the key disadvantages which are associated with most of the love marriages in India is actually the lack or the missing social insurance. This is quite true since at such times, most of the parents do not usually condone their children choosing or selecting life partners entirely by themselves. As a result, some objections usually arise due to the fact that the castes or religion and even social standings and physical appearances of the partners that they have chosen have not been fully approved by parents or elders in their respective societies.
The burning question that has been known to arise in each and every youth’s mind in contemporary India is whether they should love and marry or even prefer to marry then eventually fall in love (Rao & Finnoff, 2015). If one of them opts to go for the love marriage option and is indeed hell bent or focused on finding the suitable one in order to live happily for the rest of their lives, then there is dire need for them to put into consideration the fact that true love marriages require or need an equal amount of hard work and commitment put into it so that they can both be peaceful and happy. This is quite true since just because such love is pre-existing, this does not necessarily imply that it will still continue being so for the rest of eternity. There is need for one to effectively nurture such love and work on not only doubling it but also triple it especially for those people who are married in moments when it becomes quite difficult for them to love their partners (Rohner et al, 2015).
Conclusion
It is important to note that while most of the arranged marriages normally come with enhanced security that comes about due to parents’ greater involvement, there still remains a pertinent question of accepting and agreeing with ‘almost stranger” as part and parcel of your family for the rest of one’s life. In addition to that, the amount of judgment which the boy or girl has to encounter is known as being a big deterrent from some of the specific individuals in the contemporary society (Jejeebhoy et al, 2014). As opposed to the love marriages, the gender biased roles for both the women and men are indeed much more strongly and greatly enforced in the arranged marriages in the Indian society. However, it is also important to take in mind that there are numerous advantages as well as disadvantages to both options, yet one of the issue for sure, is that the decision of getting married whether through love or through arranged should be taken with utmost consideration and also with much more deliberation.
References
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Chaudhuri, S., Morash, M., & Yingling, J. (2014). Marriage migration, patriarchal bargains, and wife abuse: A study of South Asian women. Violence Against Women, 20(2), 141-161.
Kalokhe, A., del Rio, C., Dunkle, K., Stephenson, R., Metheny, N., Paranjape, A. and Sahay, S., 2017. Domestic Violence Against Women in India: a systematic review of a decade of quantitative studies. Global public health, 12(4), pp.498-513.
Patel, S. N., Wingood, G. M., Kosambiya, J. K., McCarty, F., Windle, M., Yount, K., & Hennink, M. (2014). Individual and interpersonal characteristics that influence male-dominated sexual decision-making and inconsistent condom use among married HIV serodiscordant couples in Gujarat, India: Results from the Positive Jeevan Saathi Study. AIDS and Behavior, 18(10), 1970-1980.
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