Discuss about the Positive Emotions & Character Strengths.
It is very essential for an individual to hold positive emotions towards whatever they do. This is one of the ways by which they can be happy. This cannot be possible all the times. The situation was a little different for me, as I was unhappy with the unknown place and also the subject which I couldn’t understand.
Four years ago, when I was 20 years old, I decided to enroll my bachelor’s degree at Assumption University of Thailand in the major of accounting. The reason why I chose to study accounting is because I love Mathematics. After I studied for a while, I realized that I do not like accounting. Accounting is too difficult for me and I cannot understand what the lecturers are teaching. Meanwhile, other people who are good in mathematics can understand accounting easily. So, I spent lots of time for reviewing and hiring the tutors to teach for many subjects. For example, I did not have a time to do any university’s activities which I really want to do because I just concentrated only on studying (Fredrickson 2001). Finally, I still cannot do well in accounting and felt that I want to change my course.
At that time, I asked my parents to change my course to marketing but they do not allow me as they thought that accounting is an important thing. They told me that they believed that I can do it if I studied hard. Nevertheless, I am a person who does not give up easily and always has the positive emotions. I thought that I may not be hard-working enough. Besides, I always use my parents’ words to encourage me when I felt downhearted or frustrated which can help me from the depression. Moreover, some of my friends who studied in this filed also faced with the depression and have to see the psychologist.
After studying accounting for two years, I still faced with the same problems that I cannot understand in the units which related to accounting and wanted to change my field. I almost forgot everything after finishing the exams and lacked of confidence when there is group discussion because I thought that I do not have any knowledge about accounting in my brain, so I always stayed quiet. Another question that came into my mind that how can I work in this field after graduating? Again, I went to ask my parents with many strong reasons to support my ideas and told them that I tried a lot for two years, but I do not want to work in this field. My parents told me that working and studying are not similar. Studying in accounting can help you to find a job more easily compared to others and also accounting is an important thing that if I want to become an entrepreneur. They told me that they allow me to change my minor subject, but the major subject should be in accounting. In addition, they will allow me to study anything that I want in my master’s degree.
That made I felt much better, in my forth year, I joined many clubs with the university such as cooking and photo club. I even performed a performance in the semester that I studied the most difficult accounting unit. I thought that it is no need for me to try as seriously as I just want to do my best. I did lots of activities and have many friends who are interested in the same things. Research states that if I can pass the most difficult thing, I can surely pass other things as well (Pogosyan 2016).
As mentioned in Barbara’s theory, to overcome the stress of accounts, I decided to undertake various activities like being a part of cooking and photo club. This developed positive feelings in me. This motivated me to concentrate on the positive things in my life and also I had the strength to overcome the negative things. Even in the near future, I would like to concentrate on the below emotions so that I have the energy and strength to move through the difficulties in life.
Undertaking simple activities like improving the quality of sleep and making friends helped me to improve the level of positive emotions in me. Research proves that these activities were undertaken consciously so that they can improve the positive emotions in me (PEP Lab 2014).
I always wanted to be friends with everybody and hence, whenever anybody needed any help, I use to be there for them. I use to expect the same from others, but with time, I realized that people need to know each other so that they can be friends with each other. I use to feel depressed if someone I knew makes fun of me or hurts me with their action. Research has proven, this will create a huge impact on my mental health as I use to be feel depressed by something that really doesn’t have much of an impact in my life (Academic Affairs 2016).
In Assumption University as well, I was expecting to make friends quickly and be comfortable but that it didn’t happen and hence, I was demotivated and not very happy about coming to the university. I spoke about this to my parents and they told me that I cannot expect to be friends with anybody so quickly. People would take their time to understand me, like me and then accept me as their friends. This helped me to understand the real meaning of friendship. I also understood that I cannot be friends with everybody or everybody cannot consider me as a friend. As per studies, there would be some qualities in me which would be loved by people and hence, they would like to be friends with me and on the other end, there would be people who may not like certain qualities in me and hence, they may not admire my friendship (Victor Seet 2018).
Even in the classroom, I heard few students passing some comments on me and that was very hurting and I was upset for few days. During this time period, I realized that I cannot satisfy the needs, requirements and expectations of everybody around me. If I start doing that then life would be a burden and at the same time, I will not be able to meet up with the expectations of people around me. After this incident, I was wandering that I have never interacted with those classmates and neither have I hurt them for anything. After much research, I realized that it was not something so serious. It was just for fun and there were no hard intentions attached to it (Ryan 2013).
To ensure that I have people around me, I get involved in various activities and clubs like photography and cooking. This allows me to interact with likeminded people who share their thoughts and opinion on various things related to the activities that we undertake. I have also learnt the art of maintaining professional relationship with everybody. I also have my few friends in the university, whom I trust and I still continue to be good with everybody, but now expectations are less, from people, than what it was in the past. I still try to over friendly with people, but then I try to control myself so that I don’t end of expecting more than required. Research states this allows me to be at mental peace (Davies 2012).
Based on Gallup’s theory, I wanted to improve on my strengths so that I can have my own group of friends. I continuously started putting in efforts to ensure that all my weaknesses can be overcome by my strengths. I decided to work on my weak areas so that I can be the proud child that my parent is expecting me to be. Few of the areas which I wanted to improve are as follows: –
Research proves that I lack these qualities and this is pulling me down, due to which people are dislike me. I have set a timeframe of 2 years to work on my weak areas so that I can improve and be better than that I am today, at this point of time (Jim 2011).
I would be completing my education in next 2 years so I want to go back to my parents and help them with their business. My father is a rice entrepreneur and I have seen working hard to set his business straight so after my education, I want to spend some time with me, understand his business and give him the much deserved break. I have seen him going through all the hardships to create a firm business and after my education, I will ensure that I will go back to them and takeover the business and also ensure that business grows than what it is today. This would my father feel proud about me.
At this point of time, I can experience positive emotions in me. This allows feel the happiness and smile on my parents’ face. At the same time, they can relax and not be overburdened, as they are today. Every day, my father wakes up at 5.30 AM to ensure that he can spend some time in his business, before the customer starts pouring in. If I take over the business in next 2 years’ time then he would have time to relax. Apart from that, I also want to send my parents for a vacation for a period of 15 days’. Since my childhood, they never had the time to spend with each other and there were plenty of other stress as well in their life and hence, they never gave much of importance to this. Now, they can go on a vacation and distress them and just feel peaceful.
Apart from the above mentioned things, I have my very own dream. I want to set up a café. I love cooking. Whenever I cook, positive emotions pour into me and this is one of the reasons, I want to set up my cafe. There are possibilities that I might feel stressed due to my father’s rice business, but that would never be the case with my café. The target of my café would be sell healthy snacks. Due to unhealthy eating habits, people are facing lot of health concerns but the food products in my café would be healthy. I would study hard to be capable enough to take care of father’s business and also to set up my own café .
I want to complete my studies with good grade so that my parents can feel proud of me. Few of colleagues who are willing to enter the corporate world put in lot of efforts so that they can get job profile that they desire. But with me, I want to enter my father’s business and hence, this is an added advantage to me. For me, the marks that I score are not very important but I really want to be very clear with the concepts of business so that I can implement the same in my rice business and also café setup.
Even today my father is not much aware of the accounting methods that can be implemented in business and hence, he spends a lot of time in calculating the money that has entered the business and also the money that has been paid to the suppliers. In the current financial year, I have taught on the various heads in accounting so that he can trace back the data easily as and when required. This helped him and hence, he feels really good about me studying accounting.
After completion of my education, I want to implement various accounting tactics so that the money control doesn’t take much of time and I can concentrate more on acquiring customers and suppliers. I want to install accounting software so that the analysis of the cost against the profit received would be easy. At the same time, I will also be able to understand the various heads under which the expenses are taking place. This will allow me to control the expenses in required places in the future years. This will save my time and I will ensure that I am able to acquire customers and at the same time, I will also look for suppliers who can supply in timely and also give best possible quality.
As on date, my father is acquiring from suppliers, who in turn acquires from farmers. Sometimes, there is a compromise in the quality and sometimes, there is shortage of supply. I want to avoid these problems when I get into business and hence, I want to explore the option of acquiring rice from the farmers. Buying organic food is the new need for today, so I want to understand it better. Understanding this will help me to understand the difference between organic and regular rice. Accordingly, I will sell it to the customers.
While doing this, I want to set up my café. Taking care of father’s business is for my father’s happiness, but setting a café is my dream and hence, I would save some money and set up a café. In this café, I would offer healthy snacks to the consumers. This would allow them to enjoy the snacks and at the same time, they need not be concerned about the health problems that would arise due to consumption of unhealthy good. In my café, I would like to explore new recipes which might be available in other cafes. This will ensure that customers are motivated to walk into my café, rather than just any other café.
Most importantly, I want to be happy and hence, I have an action plan in place so that I can achieve the goals that I have set for myself. Few of the action plans that would help me to push to my goal and also achieve my dreams, are discussed below.
First and foremost, I would like to join meditation classes so that I can concentrate on achieving the goals that I have set for myself. Sometimes, I feel much stressed with my studies and this leads to disappointment and frustration so just want to avoid at any cost. As per research, meditation would give me clarity in life and hence, it would guide me the direction in which I need to move (Henley 2017). Research states, my excess emotions would be controlled and this would lead to positive emotions like mental peace and satisfaction (Teens Health 2017).
I would like to join cooking and baking course because now, I have time to do things that I like but that might not be the case when I complete my education and take over my father’s business. Research has proven that I should keep my passion and love for cooking alive so that I can go progress in my life (Cohn 2012). After getting into my father’s business, I may not find time and energy to join cookery classes and hence, I want to utilize the available time for now. Cookery course would evoke a sense of happiness in me (Changing mind 2018).
I would start with morning walk soon as that would make me fresh and active throughout the day. I am not a morning person and hence, it becomes difficult for me to enjoy the morning weather. I would like to cultivate their habit so that I can be active throughout the day. By doing this, after my morning walk, I would also get some peaceful free time to concentrate on accounts. During this time, I can study and also complete any upcoming assignments. This schedule of mine, would help me to achieve serenity and at the same time, I can plan my day rather than running madly to accommodate one task after another.
I would spend more time my family, because my parents love me a lot and at the same time, they complain that I don’t spend quality time with them. During the day time, my father is busy in his business and hence, sitting and talking to him is merely impossible. In the next few months, I would plan a two days’ trip with them. This will allow us to spend some quality family time with each other and at the same time, my parents would be relieved from the routine daily work. This will ensure that I don’t miss my parents and at the same time, I will fill me with a sense of satisfaction. Research states, outing as a family is pending since long in my mind so I will talk to my parents and change this plan into action, rather than delaying it further (Positive Psychology Program 2018).
I am planning to do too many things in life and for the same, I need to possess few character strengths so that I can grow as I have planned. Few of things which I need to undertake so that my character strengths can be improved are discussed below.
I want to improve my curiosity towards various things. I love to explore things, but if I am not able to get the required informed after trying hard then I get demotivated. Easily leaving without reaching the goal is not a positive sign and hence, I should inculcate the curiosity factor in me. For this, I have started making a note of questions that come to my mind, while I am involved in any sort of research. Whenever I go through the questions, I would be motivated to solve the queries that are running my mind. I want to practice this for a period of 40 days so that I can get used to this, as per research claims (K-State 2017).
Kindness is my strength, but I use to expect the same from people around me as well. Now, I have understood the fact that friendship and kindness are two different things and hence, I will consciously ensure that people are I am kind to people, but at the same time, I also would ensure that I am not emotionally hurt under any condition. For the same, I want to develop my social intelligence. I am very well aware of the fact that I cannot learn this in some course or class. As per research proof, I will consciously put in efforts to ensure that I use my previous experience and learning to avoid any kind of emotional breakdown in the near future (Kulak 2014).
I am a very fair person and from now on, I have decided to practice fairness consciously. In the near future, I would be an entrepreneur and at that point of time, I want to be fair to the society, environment and the government in which the business operates. This will help me to be better than that of my competitors. If I am fair in my business then I can save my business from any legal troubles that may come. While I set up my café, fairness would be to provide best quality food to the customers and this will allow me to grow continuously, without any conscious of guilt. I will put in conscious efforts at all point of time to ensure that I am not doing anything that is legally or ethically wrong.
I would cultivate hope in my life so that I can grow in my life. As per research, many of my friends state that I cannot take care of my father’s business and set my café simultaneously, but I have hope and positivity that I will be able to achieve this (Positive Psychology Program 2016). After completion of my education, I have to support my father and this would be the result that they yield for educating me and at the same time, it would be a proud moment for my father so their shouldn’t be any compromise on that. Similarly, I don’t want my dream to just go off and hence, I will put in additional efforts to ensure that I have my dream café.
References
Jim, A (2011). How strengths boost engagement. Business Journal. Accessed on April 27, 2018. https://news.gallup.com/businessjournal/146972/strengths-boost-engagement.aspx
VIA Institute on Character. (2018). The Via Classification of strengths. Accessed on April 27, 2018. https://www.viacharacter.org/www/Character-Strengths
Academic Affairs. (2016). Strengths finder. Accessed on April 27, 2018. https://academicaffairs.iupui.edu/Renderers/ShowMedia.ashx?id=08ae59be-312c-49bf-885f-23fffd28b63c
Victor Seet. (2018). Comparing Gallup Strengthsfinder and via character settings. Accessed on April 27, 2018. https://victor-seet.com/comparing-strengthsfinder-via/
Ryan. M. (2013). VIA Survey or strengths finder? Psychology Today. Accessed on April 27, 2018. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/what-matters-most/201312/survey-or-strengthsfinder
Davies. W. (2012). Battle of the strengths: Values in Action VS Strengthsfinder. Science 2.0. Accessed on April 27, 2018. https://www.science20.com/positive_psychology_digest/battle_strengths_values_action_vs_strengthsfinder
McQuaid, M. (2017). Can you change your strengths? Huffington Post. Accessed on April 27, 2018. https://www.huffingtonpost.com/michelle-mcquaid/can-you-change-your-stren_b_9240272.html
K-State. (2017). StrengthsQuest Activity Workbook. Accessed on April 27, 2018. https://www.k-state.edu/strengths/resources/StrengthsQuest_Activity_Workbook.pdf
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Changing mind. (2018). Positive emotions. Accessed on April 27, 2018. https://changingminds.org/explanations/emotions/positive_emotions.htm
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Henley, K. (2017). What are the top 10 positive emotions? Huffington Post. Accessed on April 27, 2018. https://www.huffingtonpost.com/kari-henley/what-are-the-top-10-posit_b_203797.html
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