Unfaithful Friends And The Demise Of Stronger Social Bonds

ENG 2205 Introduction to Literary Studies

The Betrayal of Unfaithful Friends

According to some people, friendships does last forever than lover relationships. However, it is not true as some people often lose their friendships. There are a number of reasons due to which friendships do not last long. One of the reasons behind broken friendships is the unfaithful friends. Unfaithful friend is the main reason behind the betrayal between two people. Unfaithfulness often result from selfishness which in turn leads to the end of friendship as no one wants to be in friendship with a selfish person who is just concerned about his own self. Selfishness lead them to unfaithfulness towards their friends as they do not care much about anyone else. This makes hardhearted when their friend need their help. However, they don’t mind asking for help anytime when they need. This is not the real meaning of friendship. Friendship actually means a relationship of mutual affection and is considered to be a stronger form of social bond which demands trustworthiness, loyalty, empathy, etc. When these factors are missing, a friendship cannot survive in the long run. Unfaithfulness in a relationship can even become a cause of depression and loneliness (Block 200).

When there is an element of unfaithfulness in the friendship, it is likely to make the friendship inactive. Such friends are always found to be gossiping behind the back and taking advantages from them. Such unfaithful friends sometimes pretend that they are always there to understand and listen but the reality is that they don’t even care regarding the life of their friend and can even disclose their secrets without even giving it a second thought (Macmillan 877).

Now the question arises why do women and men cheat? The answer to this question provides a number of reasons to such unfaithfulness. The biggest reason among all is opportunity and unhappiness. Relationships or friendships are based on love and affection and sometimes the situations lead people to forget to converse properly ultimately causing unhappiness. Unfaithfulness is also found between the relationship of a men and women. Men cheat as they miss the feeling of admiration and feel undermined and criticized (Zembylas 13). Therefore, it is important to feel admired and trusted in a relationship whether it is between a men or women or between friends. The arising of constant arguments means the existence of in- depth issues which in turn leads to lack of emotional connection and bond between a man and woman. When men start believing that they don’t do things correctly this ultimately leads them to lose their self- esteem. Then they start creating a distance in the relationship which ultimately results in cheating and the destruction of the relationship. When men do not get any sort of positive reinforcement, he gives up all his efforts and gets at the worse stage of lack of connection. This further makes the partner feel more abandoned (Fincham Lambert and Beach 649).

Cheating by women, on the other hand, is a last resort when they feel to be betrayed by their partner. They also desire to be appreciated by their partner. The surrounded environment also encourages them to cheat as it makes cheating more acceptable for them. Such surrounded environment consists of the friends with whom they spend most of their time. When their attempts to re- connect with their partner emotionally gets neglected they decide to cheat. In other words, it can be said that unfaithfulness is the ultimate result of lack of proper communication. Mature adults can healthily avoid such issues by openly talking about it (Dosmukhambetova and Manstead 109).

The emotional bond between a couple is interrupted though cheating. Unfaithfulness results in break of trust along with giving a shock to the betrayed partner. The creation of stronger partnership, relationship or friendship can be a tough process and may take time so that the root issues can be properly worked out and trust can be developed (Watkins and Boon 240). When informed trust will be developed, slowly and gradually I get converted into blind trust. Therefore, due care should be taken while making friends or entering into a relationship with a person as there are severe chances of betrayal in both the cases. However, unfaithfulness in a relationship can be eliminated by ensuring proper communication and solving the issues in due time without making any delays in order to save the relationship from getting further damaged.

References

Block, Elizabeth Sweeny. “Water Shaping Stone: Faith, Relationships, and Conscience Formation by Kathryn Lilla Cox.” Journal of the Society of Christian Ethics 37.2 (2017): 200-201.

Dosmukhambetova, Dina, and Antony Manstead. “Strategic reactions to unfaithfulness: female self-presentation in the context of mate attraction is linked to uncertainty of paternity.” Evolution and Human Behavior 32.2 (2011): 106-117.

Fincham, Frank D., Nathaniel M. Lambert, and Steven RH Beach. “Faith and unfaithfulness: Can praying for your partner reduce infidelity?.” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 99.4 (2010): 649.

Macmillan, Sarah. “The Form and Function of Friendship in The Tretyse of Loue.” The Review of English Studies 68.287 (2017): 866-882.

Watkins, Sarah J., and Susan D. Boon. “Expectations regarding partner fidelity in dating relationships.” Journal of Social and Personal Relationships 33.2 (2016): 237-256.

Zembylas, Michalinos. “Derrida, Foucault and critical pedagogies of friendship in conflict-troubled societies.” Discourse: Studies in the Cultural Politics of Education 36.1 (2015): 1-14.